THE POPULAR FRIEND ZONE
Many of us have people in our lives whom we have carefully and consciously or unconsciously placed in that popular friend-zone! They are everywhere in our lives, they have become a part of our everyday lives, we have become so used to them (over familiarity is the term here.)
Ok, I`m gonna share with us the story of Tobe from the movie “When Love Happens” You see Tobe and Mo were great friends and to Mo, that`s all there was to it, nothing more, no strings attached. Tobe, on the other hand wanted more, but could not seem to put in words his obvious affections for Mo! So, guess what?! Mo meets Mr. Handsome-and-supposedly-Mr.Right” and is swept off her feet!
Now a lot of you guys out there are just exactly like Tobe! You`re apparently in love with your best friend (whom of course is female), you just however are so scared to tell her or let your feelings be made known to her, simply because you lack the guts or you have become so comfortable in that zone! You are scared of being rejected, you`re so scared of losing the wonderful friendship, that you choose to stay as just friends when there obviously can be much more to gain!
According to Mo and Tobe`s friend, Tseju, when she counseled Tobe, she said and I quote here “…that’s the point here, you are not supposed to remain as just friends, things are supposed to change! You are supposed to be friends first, and then you move on from there!” This is my exact point to all of you guys out there who are in the friend zone watching the one you love being swept off her feet over and over and over and over again! It`s about time you speak up or the next thing you know, she`ll be reaching out to you as Mrs. Somebody-who-is-so-not-you!
And you know the most annoying part of this friend zone situation is the fact that for every time she has a problem with Mr. Handsome-and-supposedly-Mr.Right, she keeps coming back to weep on your shoulders and talk about how he had said this and that to her and how she felt so unloved and bla bla bla bla… (oh well, those of you in this situation know how the whining goes…)
And you know it becomes even crazier when she is now with Mr. Handsome-and-supposedly-Mr.Right, and you are with Mrs.Somebody-who-does-not -get-you as much as that best friend of yours, and you can`t seem to enjoy your own relationship, you know you just keep going back there, and keep reaching out some way, you know you keep confiding in her and all that and you just keep watching and suffering in the silence.
Alright, too many words already. Point is this: RELATIONSHIPS DON’T JUST HAPPEN. ENEMIES DON’T JUST START A RELATIONSHIP. RELATIONSHIPS ARE BUILT FROM GREAT FRIENDSHIPS. YOU JUST NEED DISCERNMENT TO BE CERTAIN WHICH OF THOSE FRIENDSHIPS ARE MEANT TO BE TAKEN TO THE NEXT PHASE, AND THE TRUTH IS, MOST TIMES YOU ACTUALLY KNOW, YOU`RE JUST TOO SCARED.
I hope I have been able to reach out to someone out there, so you don’t lose that great friendship God`s given you. I mean I still feel like saying more, like YOU ARE MEANT TO GET MARRIED TO YOUR FRIEND! Is that clear?! Don’t lose that girl/lady/woman to some other guy who doesn’t even know what her favourite past time is, what food she loves, what her favourite colour is, someone who doesn’t know she is allergic to the smell of lavender, who doesn’t know that she cries when she sees certain movies, and that she sometimes snores in her sleep as a result of fatigue…and others.
Just tell her already!
Love from mzwemmy